If you’re looking for an authentic pony ride,
you’ve come to the wrong place.
We’re happy to have you.
Services
Tears for Fears | $25
10 minute ride around the block or until Ted declares that he’s, “OVER HEATING RIGHT NOW.”
Snow White | $20
Ted will attract 7 small children and he will forget you exist. When the kids clear away you’ll find him sound asleep and immovable in the middle of the road.
Wild Hearts Can’t Be Broken | $15
Ted shoves you out of the way as he leaps into the nearest body of water.
Walk of Shame | $15
Ted rides YOU
Reviews
“I’ve never seen a pony drool and sniff butts so relentlessly.” – Ken
“You can’t call narcolepsy a ‘charming, added bonus.” – Sandy
“This ‘pony’ has luscious fur but my husband fell off several times. BEWARE: NO REFUNDS GIVEN.” – Harper
“I should’ve turned around when the pony started breathing heavy and sighing, but I wanted to get the full sunset tour. WHAT A MISTAKE. We rolled down a hill, the pony danced in the river until I dragged him out, and then I had to give HIM a ride back. 0/5 stars!!” – Katherine
“I never thought a massive stuffed bear could also be the circus animal of my daughter’s wildest imagination. Thank you, Captain Ted, for making my daughter’s dreams come true.” – Honore
About Us
Ted and his partner decided to go into the pony business when Sarah’s previous employer lost funding and she was out of a job. Though she had always been the breadwinner, it was decided that it was time for Ted to start pulling his weight in the family. All 110 lbs of it.
For years, people have made cracks about Ted being the size of a shetland pony. Now, it’s time to capitalize on that resemblance. With Sarah’s experience in operations, sales and marketing and Ted’s ability to do absolutely nothing, the family business was born.
In their spare time, they enjoy snowshoeing, water sports, cocktails on their front porch, and explaining to many a passerby that Ted is a full golden retriever. No, he’s not 50% some-other-big-dog-that-people-swear-he-is.
Check out our happy customers who don’t regret their experience
Ask us about our tattoo specials!
Copyright Pony Rides by Ted – All rights reserved
Pony Rides by Ted 
I love this! Pony ride for my birthday?
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Would you like to book a private party or a 1:1 sunset ride?
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So the walk of shame could also be known as the Yakov Smirnoff. Love it Smorley!
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SEO led me to Ted and I’m better for it. Google (and Morley) knew I needed a non traditional pony ride for Christmas before I did.
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When Ted drooled on me I thought it was so thoughtful of you to put it in a pony bag and let me bring it home! Great time- thanks for the saliva!!
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OUTSTANDING!!! I’m signing the kids up:)
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